Devorah Heitner, Ph.D., visited Charlotte Latin School on April 24 and 25 as Latin’s featured wellness presenter for the 2024-25 school year. Dr. Heitner, the author of the national bestsellers Growing Up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World and Screenwise: Helping Kids Thrive (and Survive) in Their Digital World, sparked lively conversations about the mores and morals of life online. Over three sessions (one for Grades 4 through 7, one for Grades 8 through 11, and another for parents), each tailored in a developmentally appropriate manner for her different audiences, Dr. Heitner engaged the Latin community in important discussions about how children interact with modern technology — and with their peers through it.
Some key insights from Dr. Heitner’s presentations that apply to all ages:

• Character is more important than consequences. Focus on doing what is right (and does not cause harm to oneself or others) rather than what might happen if you get caught.
• Find balance in technology use. Enjoy the positive aspects of technology while recognizing the potential harm that can result from its more negative effects.
• Control your devices, rather than the devices controlling you.
• Recognize that social media and gaming platforms, through the use of algorithms, are engineered to make you want to keep using them.
• Create strategies such as employing time limits or seeking help from others around you to create boundaries with technology use.
• Remember there are other human beings on the other end of posts and texts. “When in doubt, don’t share it out.”
• Whenever possible, address negative interactions with friends face-to-face, rather than over text. The human connection and context increases the likelihood of a favorable outcome.
• Always seek others’ consent and respect their privacy before sharing content — a universal rule that includes family interactions. “You don’t want kids to feel like their parents are paparazzi.”
• Parents and children should both initiate conversations with each other to talk through technology-related concerns.

Dr. Heitner also encouraged parents to think about how while technology has changed modes of communication, the issues of growing up remain constant. Or as she put it, “Kids were saying not-nice things before they had phones to write them down on.” One difference, she pointed out, is that while children of earlier generations could more easily listen to their parents managing social interactions, the question of how adults handle email and text messages in the 21st century is almost entirely opaque to modern children. She urged parents “to talk about our relationships and how we manage them.”

Dr. Heitner was introduced at her sessions by Sonja Taylor, Associate Head of School, and Michele King, Director of Student Support and Wellness. Her visit initiated two weeks of Charlotte Latin activities and lessons designed to encourage digital wellness.